Friday, October 5, 2012

Facing my giants

I had to face one of my giants last night. I didn't think it was a giant anymore, but as it turns out, it was a pretty big, anxious, traumatic giant.

The last time I was in the hospital (for myself) if was life-threatening. The healing process was long and the post-traumatic stress effected a lot of people around me, including my marriage. Read here for the story of my Factor V Deficiency and my last hospital stay, see here. 

A few weeks ago I got a pedicure (which I have been enjoying on the weekends the boys are with their dad.)  and, unfortunately, I received a bad one.

The woman cut into my hang nail and cut my skin. It got infected - badly - and ingrown even worse. After 10 days of antibiotics didn't work, I ended up in the ER to get it removed.

It's a simple in-office procedure. Why the ER you ask?

The last time I had a partial toenail taken off they did it in the OR with FFP (fresh frozen plasma). Everything has been preventative because of my disorder until the fiasco of Ryan's birth (again read the story.)

Going to the hospital last night, knowing the possibility of having to get FFP again was terrifying. I was so emotional, anxious and afraid. But I went. I faced it head on and came home without any FFP and part of my big toenail missing. I can't say this giant is gone for good, but I pray my visits to the hospital for myself (and for others) remain just as rare as they have been.

*For a great book on facing your own giants, read Facing Your Giant by Max Lucado. 


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